MIT 30 Reunion Weekend Retrospective from 2019

I'm notorious for starting blog posts and letting them wither into the past. I came upon this one, started over two years ago and it seems appropriate to reflect upon it now with all that has changed.

 

 
In June, 2019, I attended my MIT 30 year class reunion. Here are my thoughts coming off that visit:

 

 
June 10, 2019

 
I'm back from a weekend in Boston reconnecting with old friends at my 30th college reunion. In addition to my graduating class, the dorm I lived in all four years held a special reunion spanning all years of alumni. Although I keep in touch with many friends via FB, connecting with friends IRL results in a richer experience (well, duh!). I hadn't seen many of my classmates and (sadly) my really good friends in many years. These lifelong friends helped me navigate those 4 years of college, those 4 years of incredible growth and change. In an era devoid of electronic communication (I remember email being a cool new thing my senior year in college), smart phones and social media, we connected with one another by opening up our dorm room doors, working on problem sets together, and (gasp) talking to one another. We supported one another through the good and the bad, discovered love and heartbreak together and in the process had a really good time.

 

 

 

 
Good friends re-unite

 

 
Sadly, it seems as if that era, one full of freedom and personal discernment has long passed, replaced with regulated barriers, rules and restrictions for the "safety of the student" (and maybe to offset the potential for litigation towards the university). On one hand, I understand the use of such controls, being a parent with college aged students. Conversely, I expect my adult children to act responsibly, and to take into account their own safety and consequences for their actions.

 

 
For example - "back in the day" (gosh, I sound like an old geezer), our dorm was left unlocked during the general hours. People entered without having to check in, sign in, swipe in, or whatever. Now the building is locked at all times, and access only given to those who live there. While I understand the need for security, we were lucky to not need those measures due to a community who recognized if a stranger was in the house. I realize the threat of opportunistic characters has increased over the years to where such protocols are required; I'm simply sad they limit access for those without the intent of malice.

 

 
The open doors have been replaced with self-closing, spring loaded fire doors, which require a ten pound doorstop to prop open. The open access roof deck is now locked unless there is a University sanctioned and monitored event, to prevent unwanted and unsafe behaviors from occurring. Gone are the epic weekend parties in the basement dining hall, the Friday evening happy hours. Those social events, along with the annual musical, talent shows and ski trips softened the "geek" out of many of us. Maybe hindsight only recalls the fun times and forgets the hardship, but I fondly remember those four years.

 

 
And now, as a fifty something adult, I acknowledge the challenge in making new friends. I also realize that real (not via electronic means) social interaction is key to happiness and longevity.

 

 
June 25, 2021

 
Update Two (!) years later and wow, much has changed in these mere two years - a world now exists that we couldn't have imagined even 18 months ago. In the last 18 months we endured Covid Lockdowns, rabid news outlets serving up grim realities, sensationalized messages of fear, then hope in the form of groundbreaking medicine and a new normal. My sphere of loved ones weathered the storm well - we continue to be healthy, financially stable and connected - both physically and virtually.

 

 
My observations from two years ago still ring true - that real social interaction is key to happiness and longevity. But I realize that humans possess the innate ability to adapt - we pivoted to amped up virtual interactions (hello Zoom meetings - we didn't know you existed two years ago) and utilizing technology to remain connected to each other.

 

 
Spawned by the Pandemic, one of my MIT friends, Amy, re-connected several of us via weekly Zoom meetings. This has been such a great blessing. A few weeks ago, Amy was in Chicago visiting her mother and family so I drove north to visit her. Another MIT friend, Debbie, will travel here in August with her son, who decided to enroll at the U of I across town. The Pandemic cancelled everyone's plans and as a result, I've had more opportunities to interact with local friends.

 

 
Amy and I explore the Chicago Botanical Gardens

 

 
Rainy day outing with Photog friends

 

 
In the midst of Sakura Blossoms

 
Spring Hike with friends and Blue Bells

 

 
As the "new normal" emerges, one thing remains the same - constant change. May we continue to foster meaningful relationships with one another and cherish the friendships / community it brings.

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Tulips and Aging Gracefully

I seldom pass the opportunity to purchase cut tulips in the store. They beckon me with their teardrop shape and graceful stems. I know I will be rewarded with a week of ever changing blooms as the tulip fully opens and finally withers.







This bouquet lasted me almost 10 days! On the last morning, even with mostly yellowed leaves and wrinkled petals barely holding on, they still gave me immense enjoyment and caused me to reflect on the prospect of aging. If the tulip can die gracefully, and in each phase of aging retain beauty, giving joy to those around them, then that is how I want to age. (Because let's all be real - each passing year brings new aches, loss of some ability and physical changes that we don't like).


Like the old tulip - open, wrinkled, withered and faded - I aim to open myself up to new ideas, new technologies; to not get bogged down in what used to be, to not close myself off from the world and people. To be flexible and flowing; to open up and show the insides that had been hidden in youth. To embrace the imperfections, the wrinkles, and know those marks still give off your beauty. To give love and joy to those around you - like the fading tulip.

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The Soundtrack Of My Life - Welcome to the Real World

Many of my FB friends are posting the 10 albums that impacted their lives and most of them center around their late teen years into college. Seeing the music of those free spirited days bring me back to the Soundtrack of my Life series that I haven’t added to in many years. I blame the home quarantine orders, the work from home, cancel everything, going a little stir crazy situation nagging me to continue with my music ramblings and nostalgia.

My last soundtrack post left me on the high of those Carefree College years. It’s no wonder I stopped - the reality of graduation, post college jobs, aka the Real World, smacks you in the face. I feel I had a good transition into the workforce yet I would be lying if I didn’t second guess myself, experienced doubt, uncertainty, loss and anxiety during that time. Sounds like the present day only things weren’t bad at all (there's that perspective for you).

I graduated with a job, took the summer off, traveled to Europe with friends before starting my “real life” as an engineer working for General Electric. I entered their two year rotational program, where I would have 4 - 6 month assignments across two business locations. It was an ideal start for someone who didn’t want to commit to something “permanent” because that was too scary for the 22 year old me. I spent my first year in Cleveland OH. A major city felt right coming from 4 years in Boston. There were other young engineers on the same rotational program - promise of cohorts and community. Here’s the music I associate with my entry into the Real World:

End of the Innocence by Don Henley

The lyrics and serious tone resonated the "how can I really be an adult" me. The addition of Bruce Hornsby’s piano chords on this track adds to wistfulness, melancholy and longing for a bygone, simpler time.

Remember when the days were long
And rolled beneath the deep blue sky
Didn't have a care in the world
With mommy and daddy standin' by
.....
But this is the end
This is the end of the innocence

I still remember discovering Cleveland, driving the curves of I-90 with my new life in front of me, these song providing the backdrop. The album is filled with serious themes - transitions from youth to adulthood, and the onset of responsibility; fitting for that season of my life.



We Didn’t Start the Fire by Billy Joel


This list song references pop culture icons, political issues and emotionally charged events. Spanning 40 years of "headline events", this digest of the world’s events remind us that the world will continue to churn with good things and bad.

"Wheel of Fortune", Sally Ride, heavy metal, suicide
Foreign debts, homeless vets, AIDS, crack, Bernie Goetz
Hypodermics on the shores, China's under martial law
Rock and roller cola wars, I can't take it anymore
We didn't start the fire
It was always burning
Since the world's been turning

I was fortunate to catch billy Joel in concert (twice) in Cleveland.


Hold On (For One More Day) by Wilson Phillips.

Who didn’t need a peppy song like that when the days felt awful and you needed a pick me up.

Some day somebody's gonna make you want to turn around and say goodbye.
'Til then, baby, are you gonna let them hold you down and make you cry?

Don't you know?
Things'll change,
Things'll go your way,
If you hold on for one more day.
Can you hold on for one more day?
Things'll go your way
(Things are gonna go your way)
Hold on for one more day

The entire album, with its tight harmonies has many gems including Release Me and You’re In Love. Wilson Phillips may have been the first female group I felt drawn to for their pure musicality. (I just realized my Soundtrack artists lean towards male dominated artists - that changes as I get older with higher prevalence of female artists)


Blame it on the Rain by Milli Vanilli

I'm admittedly embarrassed this is on my list, but it conjures up vivid memories for me working on the computer with my fellow program engineers. We would sing the chorus while plugging away at our assignments. Yes, completely fluffy, (lip synced) and fun.


Another Day in Paradise by Phil Collins -
Phil Collins had uncanny ability to put out songs that mirrored your present life - new love, break up, fun times, bad time and this one served as a reminder that I certainly couldn’t whine and complain about my situation - that others suffered more.

Oh think twice, it's another day for you and me in paradise
Oh think twice, 'cause it's just another day for you,
You and me in paradise, think about it

Much like present day - my life, my kids’ lives, while inconvenienced by the pandemic’s impact, remains stable and comfortable. We're simply in another transition to a different stage of life. Or a different Way of Life....

And so I’ll end this edition of the soundtrack of my life with a current song to remember this tumultuous time, Orpheus by Sara Bareilles.

I know you miss the world, the one you knew
The one where everything made sense
Because you didn't know the truth, that's how it works
...
Don't stop trying to find me here amidst the chaos
Though I know it's blinding, there's a way out
Say out loud
We will not give up on love now
No fear, don't you turn like Orpheus, just stay here
Hold me in the dark, and when the day appears
We'll say
We did not give up on love today

Performed live in Madison Square Garden, this includes opening comments prior to the song and even though the performance was six months ago, the sentiments still ring true now.


I hope you’re hanging in there during these stressful times. Get outside, enjoy the rebirth of spring and spread positivity and love. The Real World needs it now.


Other Soundtrack of My Life Posts:
The Early Years
The Middle School Years,
High School Anthems
Love Songs
a Cappella Songs.
Classical, Jazz and Show Tunes
College Party Songs
Carefree College Life
My First Marathon - The Playlist
More Running Playlist Songs

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Life's Curveballs

Hindsight is 20/20 and can help put into perspective these crazy days with all of its doomsday pandemic reports. Chaos reigns, mass media allows it to infiltrate our core being. Is it any wonder we’ve become anxiety ridden society? I put it all into perspective....

Rewind 12 months - my daughter, like most seniors in college trying to figure out what direction to take, chose to build upon her study abroad program in Africa and decided to pursue an opportunity in the Peace Corps. She applied in January to an available position in Mongolia and while she had hoped to serve in Africa, she took the assignment in Asia. She was scheduled to leave in late May, two weeks after graduation.
Most of March and April were spent preparing for graduation and her planned future in Mongolia. Life, though filled with daily stresses, seemed to progress “on plan”. I enjoyed the anticipation of commencement and attended several campus event with Erica and her friends.
Erica was also training for her first half marathon with my run club so I saw her frequently.

Then what felt like a life altering event occurred - while running the half marathon Erica sustained a stress fracture in her fibula. Upon seeing the xrays days after the race (she did finish; we thought the injury was a muscle strain), we realized the Peace Corps would pull her medical clearance. She would not go to Mongolia in May.

We didn't know she had broken her fibula!

Life’s once clear path flipped and curved into a murky abyss.

I admit I was stressed about the situation because I do not like sudden change that I cannot control. In addition to these changes, Erica’s personal mobility took a hit - she was put into a medical boot, given crutches with instructions for no weight bearing movement. I then realized how unfriendly campus could be, with its sprawling grounds and barebones handicap access. While I’m sure the university is fully compliant with the ADA laws, this sudden change was not easy to adjust to on the fly. (And I now fully appreciate such ADA laws and requirements). She essentially moved back home and I drove her to the last few weeks of classes and Final exams. She graduated gracefully sporting those crutches across the stage. She certainly stood out! The day after graduation, she and several friends flew to St. Thomas - crutches be damned!

Crutching Across the Stage to Receive her Diploma

Amidst all these events, Erica made alternate plans for the summer. She got a summer job teaching science to under privileged girls in Chicago. After 6 weeks the fracture healed and she applied for another opening in the Peace Corps - an assignment in Africa. She was offered a position to work in Guinea as an AgroForestry volunteer, a position better aligned with her interests and degree. This job would start in December.

The initiator - the broken fibula that felt like a huge disruption at the time, really served as a course adjustment and allowed all of us room to accept the oncoming change.

Erica spent her summer in the Big City, clearly enjoyed teaching science and making an impact on her students. She was able to join our extended family’s grand vacation in Hilton Head. She worked at the horse barn until departing in December.

How Often Do All the Cousins Get together? Not Often Enough

I was able to accompany her to her departure city of Washington DC and give her a big hug before setting her off on her great adventure. Had she gone to Mongolia, I would have missed that departure.

As of mid February, she has been officially installed in her village where she will serve over the next two years. While life there exhibits hardships and challenges, she has made friends and strives to make a difference.

Featured on the Peace Corps Guinea IG Feed for International Women's Day!

Had she gone to Mongolia, she would be coming back to the US, a mere 6 months into her official assignment. Last week, Peace Corps evacuated all their workers in Mongolia due to the coronavirus. These events cemented in my mind - she was never meant to go to Mongolia. She is exactly where she’s supposed to be. And if she gets sent home from Africa, then it will be OK.

The lesson to be learned here? To be content with the change and challenges presented to us in this crazy thing called life. Perhaps what you planned for and worked towards didn’t pan out and carves out into another direction. Do the best you can with a positive attitude. Ask for help. Build a community of friends to support you in the good and the bad. Don’t be afraid of change. Take it in faith that things will work out.

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Fleeting Spring

fleeting (adj) ....passing swiftly; vanishing quickly; transient; transitory

spring blossoms bring bursts of color from the dormant ground
buds emerge from barren branches
color abounds

before lush greenery fills the branched air
the magnolia, cherry blossom and sakura create a veil

petals rain down in the warm breeze,
a fleeting spring,
alive from the ground and in the trees










it is not a metaphor for life? enjoy it while you can.

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The Prairie Fields - Rest And Heal

Some photos I captured walking around the prairie last Saturday - the bright sunshine tempered the brisk wind, although it felt more like March than February.



Normally, I spend my Saturday mornings running - it is my designated "long run" day, but not last weekend. The previous Monday, I managed to strain my quad in yoga class while stretching it (aggressively) - the muscle "popped", then hurt and I knew that was trouble.



Nevertheless, it has all turned out fine. I foam rolled / massaged the muscle and resulting knot, put my leg into a compression sleeve, elevated it, and (most importantly) simply rested it. Normal walking wasn't painful, but descending the stairs served as a reminder that all was not normal. I was mentally ready to take 3-4 weeks off, because the reality is unless you take the time to heal, the injury will always linger and make you pay later on.



Somehow, on Friday afternoon the pain simply no longer existed. I could still feel the knot on my quad, but no other remnants of the injury.

I felt it prudent to give it another day, so I substituted a long swim in lieu of my normal long run. And added a leisurely walk around the prairie with my camera. The following day, I ran 3 miles without any issues.


Photography note - I shot the above photo using the "back button focus" technique, something a little different for me and technique I will continue to practice.

So, what did I learn? One - to take it easier on the stretching in yoga. Two - 5 days off from running, interval training, yoga and my normal intense activities forced me to reset. I should take breaks like that more often. Three - the body is an incredible machine, never to be underestimated.

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Best Laid Plans - Running in the Rain

Best Laid Plans Of Mice and Men often go astray – Robert Burns

I thought I had it all figured out after last Saturday’s final Long training run – my planned marathon outfit had been flight tested, my wireless headphones checked out, and my running playlist updated. We headed into full taper mode, keeping a watchful eye on the upcoming weather for Saturday’s race.

In the process of stalking the weather, I learned that the Weather Underground web site provides a very comprehensive hourly forecast, complete with precipitation, wind speed and barometric graphs - perfect for this engineering geek....

See that Blue Bump on the Lower Bar Chart - High Chance of Rain Saturday

Earlier in the week, the forecast called for 20% chance of rain with temperatures cooler than normal at 40-60 degF. No problem, actually very nice weather for running. But as the week progressed, we watched that chance-of-rain percentage grow to 80%, with the most probable rain falling during race time. While I don’t mind running in the rain, I’ve never run more than 60 minutes in a light rain and that was in the summer with no wind. Another factor – while the temperatures will hover between 45-50 degF (not too bad), there will be a 15 mph wind from the east, so for the last 6 miles, we will be running straight into the wind (not good).

There's no denying it - it's going to rain and I'm going to have to run in it. I found myself pouring over race photos from Monday’s Boston Marathon (I think it was colder there), noting what people are wearing, researching “running marathon in the rain”, and settled on the following adjustments:

1. Instead of a short sleeved UA tech top, I will run in a long sleeved merino wool shirt from PEP. I’m choosing this shirt because the wool will keep me warm with the cold rain and wind. If I get too hot, the sleeves are loose enough for me to push up. I’m also putting a fresh shirt out on the course, just in case I need it (one of my friend’s house is at mile 16).
2. My pricey, brand new wireless headphones will stay at home, and I’m going with a pair of wired Skull Candy headphones. If they don’t survive the rain, no big deal. I’m not concerned about my iPhone because it will be protected by a Lifeproof case
3. I originally planned to wear a cute running skirt, but that no longer works because of the wired headphones. My phone, with the Lifeproof headphone adapter no longer fits in the pocket of the skirt. Instead, I’m going with the running shorts I wore for the Chicago Marathon.
4. FlipBelt. I’ve run with this all winter long, and hadn’t planned on using it on Saturday, but it will now hold my iPhone. I will attach my race bib to the Flip Belt, too, instead of pinning it to my shirt. This will make any needed shirt adjustments easier (like getting a fresh shirt half way through the race).
5. [Sorry if this is TMI] I'll use Aquaphor and Body Glide on my feet. I expect they will get wet and I’ve read these products may help minimize blistering. I also used waterproofing spray on my shoes.
6. I will don a trash bag / disposable rain poncho to keep me dry-ish and warm(er) while waiting for the race to start. Just so you know, I've opted for the sleek trash bag look with the tall, white kitchen bag variety because deep down, I want my race photos to look fabulous.
7. I normally run with a white brimmed hat in the summer as it keeps my head cool (black hair is notorious for soaking in the sun's heat), and in rain it is a must. I convinced two co-workers to go out and buy wicking running hats this week for the race.

I do know this - even though I cannot control the weather on race day and I cannot control the course conditions, I can control the way I talk to myself during the event - I will stay positive, I know I can get the race done.

Finally, since I can't have a blog post without some sort of photo, here is one I took last week, during a foggy morning run.


Good luck to all my friends - fellow marathon training buddies running in the Illinois Marathon events! My husband will be running his first half marathon and several co-workers are running the full marathon. It's going to be great!

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Cast a Wide Net

Hopefully you catch what you seek.



In this case, "we" were out catching live bait for an inland fishing experience. (I say "we" because "we" were in the boat with our fishing guide - in reality, he was doing all the work). I feel fortunate to have captured the scene above - it's not every day I find myself underneath the Sanibel Island bridge at sunrise with a slew of fishermen. I have many more photos to share from that amazing experience, hopefully later this week.

Until then, I hope you cast out and find what you seek.

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The Orchid

In warmer climes, the orchid is often found growing where ever it gains a foot hold, even in the crook of a tree branch.



Thriving outside its comfortable pot. Adapting to the situation at hand. Maybe I could learn something from that orchid.

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Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

My daughter, a senior in High school, applied to four colleges. She’s been accepted to three so far, and the last school (University of Illinois) is expected to release their decision letters / notifications today. Based on her grades and test scores, we assume she’ll be accepted there (but you never know!). Then starts the decision making process. Scott and I would prefer she stay local, but not because we expect to ever see her during the semester. With her horse, Caesar, it makes sense for her to be close by. But it’s not our decision to make.

I am seriously considering entering the New York City Marathon Lottery. This is not a guaranteed race entry – lottery entrants will be picked via the lottery which occurs on March 3. It is estimated that less than 20% of the lottery applications are selected for the race. This is the same process I took last year when I entered to run the Chicago Marathon. The main difference is the percentage picked – for Chicago, 40% of the lottery entrants were selected. I have until Sunday, February 15 to decide!

We decided to book a family trip to Kauai, Hawaii. Scott and I planned to go to the island on our honeymoon nearly 23 years ago, but Hurricane Iniki changed our plans - this hurricane hit Kauai the day before we got married. We spent our honeymoon exploring Maui instead. We always said we would return to see what we missed and we'll get our chance this summer.

I was scheduled for an early workday start on Tuesday morning and I decided to take my phone with me into the plant after I caught pink steam rising above one of the buildings. I think it ended up being a good decision.



The most pressing decision of the weekend will be.... how to spend our President's Day Monday holiday! It's Chinese New Year, so I will be making dumplings. It's going to be great.

Are you off for President's Day? Regardless, I hope you have a great weekend!

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Thinking Out Loud

No reference to Ed Sheeran's latest hit, even though it's on repeat in my head. And I don't really like the song that much, other than the melody (lovely) and his live performance at Sunday night's Grammy Awards (awesome). My reason for not liking the song is that it is destined to be the upcoming wedding season's cliche. It's the same reason I didn't like Sara Bareilles' I Choose You.

But I AM Thinking Out Loud this evening, trying to type something coherent while the cat vies for my attention by walking on the keyboard. So why does he ignore me when I'm doing nothing on the couch? Cats....

I have an obsession with rain, I love the sound of it even if it's not real rain:

The video clip is snow melting off a park shelter, falling like rain off the perforated roof. These are the crazy things I am attracted to after a long run (probably because I'm not thinking too clearly).

Which reminded me of the time this past summer, after the morning's run, I was cooling down in my backyard with some yoga stretches when the storm-threatened sky released the rain. It fell slowly at first - you know - those fat drops that dot the concrete - before accelerating into a curtain of water. I merely continued my stretches in the rain, then realized I was being watched - the people who moved into friend Kellie's house were peering out at me, "that crazy woman doing yoga in the rain". I make a great first impression....

Thinking about the Grammy's, I admire and secretly covet Madonna's legs. I guess it's no longer a secret now...

I'm a tiny bit jealous of all the snow Massachusetts has received, although I'm not sure if I would like it in reality. Six feet of snow sounds like fun. In reality, it's probably too overwhelming.

Some recent remnants of snow in the front yard:


So, no snow here and we had a true taste of spring this past weekend - so much so that I washed the car with the garden hose and hosed down the garage floor. Dare I say, maybe the ground hog was wrong? Is it Opposite day?

Aren't you glad I decided to Think Out Loud?

Yeah, don't answer that....

Edited to add - this link takes you to a video of Ed Sheeran's Grammys performance of Thinking Out Loud, also featuring John Mayer on the guitar. US Weekly Magazine Online - Ed Sheeran Video

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The Rut

Confession time – I’m in a photography and blogging rut. I’m just not “into” it. I guess I should qualify the photography comment – I’m in a “formal” photography rut, ie, I’ve been neglecting my “big camera”. Looking at my flickr stream, it’s been over a month since I’ve uploaded anything from my DSLR. There are photos on my camera card I haven’t uploaded – photos from before Christmas.

I’m just not into it (gah, I never thought it would be this way). I need inspiration – normally found in something pretty and glittery outside (hello, where is this winter’s snow? Why does the North east get all the fun?). And I’m tired of my usual standby of flowers in winter.

I obviously need a kick in the butt, maybe a photography challenge. Maybe I just need to get outside at sunset (which, unfortunately, falls during dinner prep time). Maybe I need to drive to the local park and see what is revealed to me.

Or, I could be satisfied with what I’ve been capturing on my iPhone. After two months with the iPhone 6, I think I've gotten used to the new camera. I tend to take photos while I’m out running, but I’ve snapped a few randomly here and there:




Or, I can trust that this lull will soon pass, that I will find inspiration again.

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Begin Again

I willfully sat down last Saturday (maybe two Saturday's ago - I've lost track) and actually watched a full length movie at home. (those who know me realize this is quite a feat - I don't sit down for long periods of time at home, unless I'm napping) The movie that successfully captured my attention - Begin Again, a music centric story of a washed up, mid-life crisis record executive who reclaims his life while helping an indie singer-songwriter record music in the streets of New York.

Begin Again stars Keira Knightley as the singer, and yes, she actually sings in the movie. She plays Gretta, a songwriter who comes to New York with her singer boyfriend, who is on the cusp of commercial stardom. She finds herself on the outside as her partner (played by Adam Levine) is swept away by the music industry machine. Mark Ruffalo plays the record executive, a drunkard louse, who sees potential in Gretta's stripped down, acoustic songs.

I thoroughly enjoy the movie, bought the soundtrack and now share some of it with you. I love the melodies and lyrics, but mostly the simplicity of the performances - there's real joy seen here.



Lost Stars, performed by Keira Knightley

Please, don't see
Just a girl caught up in dreams
And fantasies

Please, see me
Reaching out for someone
I can't see

Take my hand
Let's see where we wake up tomorrow
Best laid plans
Sometimes are just a one night stand

I'll be damned
Cupid's demanding back it's arrow
So let's get drunk on our tears

And God, tell us the reason
Youth is wasted on the young
It's hunting season
And the lambs are on the run

Searching for meaning
But are we all lost stars
Trying to light up the dark

What does it take to Begin Again? Sometimes you have to hit rock bottom, other times you need to take a chance. Most importantly, you have to know yourself and "to thine self, be true".

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Along My Run | 10 - November Contrasts

November is a month of contrasts - the leaves have peaked and by the end of the month, fall's glory is but a memory, replaced by a barren, skeletal landscape. We experienced a cornucopia of weather conditions - typical fall temperatures in the mid-30's, then a preview of winter with bitter temperatures, complete with single digit wind chills and a sprinkling of snow. To round out the month, the last day of November felt like Spring - a balmy 55 degrees.

Like I said, a month of contrasts.


1. A year later and the way I run has changed me. Thank you for finding me that morning , 2. Peaking Canopy. Most of the Leaves are gone , 3. Passing Through, 4. Morning Haze. Even When It's Cloudy, a Rrun Makes Things Better, 5. Standing Still, before the Winds Picked up. Noted on my run - the Flock of geese overhead, in perfect V formation, the Hawk that flew by, the 20mph westerly wind between miles 7 and 9. Things that make you feel alive. , 6. Fading Away - I haven't run on this street in over two months, and it looks completely different now., 7. A Bit of Craziness -single digits. I even saw two other runners out there, so I'm not alone in my craziness. Wind was a killer., 8. Confessions of a Cold Weather Runner. Not shown - the double tights and long sleeve shirt I'm wearing., 9. Reaching Out For Someone I Can't See, 10. Brisk , 11. Take My Hand, Let's See Where We Wake Up Tomorrow , 12. November Blues -A warm and balmy morning - feels like spring! I'll take it - enjoyed my run in shorts and a tee shirt!

From a running standpoint, November served as a low-key, take things easy, run whatever feels good month. I cut back from running 4 days per week to 3 days, took more full rest days, added in more spinning classes and started a program with a personal trainer. I signed up with the personal trainer to address the strength imbalances I have between my left (weaker) and right sides, with the goal of preventing future injuries. I'm happy to report the Plantar fasciitis in my left foot is gone - I'm no longer running with tape or any arch support device.

November's Stats: 115 miles, 9:07 minute / mile average pace
Longest distance run: 13.2 miles one Saturday, even though we had originally planned to run 10 miles. We called it our virtual Half Marathon for November.

Hopefully, December won't pose too many foul weather challenges so I can finish up 2014 in good shape for 2015.

This month's running quotes, courtesy of great women runners:
I don't feel like myself unless I run. It's how I deal with sadness and happiness. I need it. It's like therapy.
– Kara Goucher
(I can totally relate)

A goal is just an awesome way to force growth on yourself.
– Deena Kastor

Running is not who I am; it's something I do; it's something I love.
– Lauren Fleshman

Racing teaches us to challenge ourselves. It teaches us to push beyond where we thought we could go. It helps us to find out what we are made of.
– PattiSue Plummer

The things we love, have passion for, help us grow. What's your passion, what have you learned about yourself through that passion? My passions include running, photography and music. Embrace your passions each day - you won't regret it.

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The Friday Five - Summer Review

Summer Lights Up the Boston Skyline

With the official start of Autumn this past Tuesday, I thought it would be interesting to look back at the past summer.

1. The weather - Again, I'm fixated on the weather. This summer's cooler than normal temperatures, coupled with ample rain was simply perfect. For the first summer ever, I didn't have to water the lawn!
2. We moved our daughter's horse, Caesar, to a new barn, a great place that is much closer to our house (10 minutes away vs 30 minutes).
3. I took my son and one of his friends to Boston and had a great time. I visited my parents, staying in their Plymouth home, probably for the last time (they plan to sell the house soon).
4. I participated in a month long on-line yoga challenge, focusing on arm balances. I don't often mention my yoga pursuits here, and this challenge was just that - very challenging, but I a learned a ton. If you care to see the poses, head over to this set on my Flickr Stream.
5. Even with the good, there was some sadness this summer. My good friend, Kellie, moved away, my violin teacher decided to stop teaching and I lost a running partner. But with each change, we grow and adapt. I am blessed by so much, regardless of the season.

Did you have a great summer?

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The College Visits - Five Things

The Bell Tower at Michigan State University

My daughter and I have been out visiting colleges and here Five Random Observations from our adventures:

1. Every single college she has chosen to visit is a five hour drive. Not close enough to allow for an "out and back" in one day jaunt, but a drive there, stay overnight, tour the campus and drive home experience. I've forgotten how exhausting it is to drive five hours straight at 80 mph through crowded, urban traffic and numerous road construction sites. Then there is the choice of music that gets played while driving. Yes, I like most music, but I did tire of the Cage The Elephant Station on Pandora, mainly because it didn't feature any female artists.

2. Just because two colleges are in the same state doesn't mean they are close. We planned to visit University of Kentucky and Murray State University, back-to-back as they are both in Kentucky. Then I realized the schools are 4 hours apart. The original plan was to get up really early, drive (5 hours) to UK, tour there, then drive 4 hours to Murray and stay overnight. After an early morning Murray State tour, drive (5 hours) home. I've decided that's too much driving for me. And my daughter decided she is no longer interested in either of those schools anymore, so it's all a mute point (and I am secretly relieved).

3. I've discovered those Starbucks Frappacino drinks available at gas station convenience stores are my go-to perk-me-up, keep-me-awake on-the-road elixir. Typically, I'm a Diet Coke person while driving, but these keep me going better. It must be all that added sugar and fat.

4. Certain college demographics, like student body size, are very important when considering a college. My daughter only realized that when we visited the small (really, it was tiny) school in Ohio and she realized that Mom wasn't stupid to ask her things like "how big is the school"? While I have nothing against small schools (they offer a very personalized experience and for some students, that is a perfect fit), when you are used to the Big 10 University across town, a small campus can be quite shocking.

5. Teenagers change their minds. She's already changed her potential major from Equine Studies to Pre-Veterinary. So she wants to go to Vet school and be a large animal vet. I expect there to be more changes as we go through this process. No big deal - in some ways, I'm still deciding "what I want to be when I grow up", so I can't expect my 17 year old to know exactly what she wants to do. I'm glad she is targeting larger schools that offer a wide variety of degrees and diversity.

Those are my five facts, and here are some more things I've noticed since "heading back to school" - those similar iconic elements every institution boasts:

• The large football stadium
• The statue / arch / building that everyone takes their picture in front of when visiting / starting school / graduating.
• A Bell Tower
• A large courtyard or "Quad" where coeds hang out, especially when the weather turns warm.
• Lots of green space (very appreciated) or a botanical garden / forested area.
• Plenty of traditions to wrap yourself in, as college becomes its own metropolis / world, isolated from what I'll call "the real world".

It's a great time in a person's life - a time to discover so many things, to grow, to work hard, to play hard - still not too burdened by adulthood and its responsibilities. I'm excited for my daughter as she explores what opportunities await her.

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August 1 - Weather The Change

Random thoughts as I captured this morning's sky - August 1 ushers in another season of change. "Because it can't be a mistake, if I just call it change". Letting Go and Moving Forward.

Who knew that August would become the new January? It has become the month that signals the start of something new. Summer, with its intoxicating mix of freedom, sunshine, recreation, relaxation, balmy breezes and long days clings on, but can’t overcome the reality of darker mornings, empty beaches and back to school sales.

Who could predict the impact of change within my life, just over the past year? While nothing earth shattering, so many things have changed. My husband started a new job exactly a year ago - that situation, came with many positives but a few not so positive aspects. I go over the past year’s events and can’t help but wonder what’s in store this year.

A Year Ago - After Scott left to start his new job. Beauty transcends sadness.

Change, while always present, will be amplified this year as we face major life milestones – both children are in High school, there will be college visits, college applications and a high school graduation. As a mother, there can be no bigger milestone than one of her children leaving the nest - a necessary rite of passage for the child, a tumultuous one for the mother.

Of course, with all change come new opportunities. We just need to see them that way. Let go, trust and enjoy the ride. I hope I can do just that.

The song, Landslide seems to be appropriate today.

I took my love and took it down
I climbed a mountain and I turned around
And I saw my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Till the landslide brought me down

Oh, mirror in the sky, what is love?
Can the child within my heart rise above?
Can I sail through the changing ocean tides?
Can I handle the seasons of my life?

Well, I've been afraid of changing
'Cause I've built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Even children get older
And I'm getting older too

Well, I've been afraid of changing
'Cause I've built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Even children get older
And I'm getting older too
Oh, I'm getting older too

I take my love, take it down
I climb a mountain and turn around
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Will the landslide bring you down
And if you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills
Will the landslide bring you down, oh, oh
The landslide bring you down

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Seven Questions - From That's What She Said

Wine Bottles Adorn the Window Before the Show

A couple weekends back, I had the wonderful opportunity to attend a unique performance - That's What She Said - a venue of speakers and musicians - women sharing their stories and finding connection through those stories. Most of the speakers were local and the topics ranged from the familiar, funny elements of motherhood, to the heartbreaking account of watching a loved one die.

The organizers also posed seven questions to numerous local people (including my good friend, Lisa) and published their responses in the program. I thought it would be fun to answer those same questions here.

1. What are you grateful for today?
I am grateful for the incredible abundance in my life. I have so many wonderful people in my life who love and support me. I have a healthy mind and body that can do incredible things. I am surrounded by beauty and bounty.

2. Tell us about one of your friends and what you love about her.
Lisa, who I mention above, is one of my neighbors and a dear friend. I still remember the first time we met - it was Halloween in 2002, my family had just moved to Illinois and were trick-or-treating in our would be subdivision. Lisa was visibly pregnant and exuded hospitality and kindness. After meeting her and feeling immediately like family, we knew we had chosen the right neighborhood. Lisa is always there to help a friend out, lend a compassionate ear, and if needed, a swift kick in the butt.

3. Describe one of the best days of your life.
I have to choose just one? The day my daughter was born - after 13 hours of labor, there emerged this perfect baby. And then there was the birth of my son, who popped out 20 minutes after I walked into the emergency room at the hospital. If it hadn't been for my husband insisting we leave for the hospital, he would have been born on the highway. In both cases, the growth and emergence of new life was such an incredible experience - that my body knew exactly what to do, regardless of the number of books I had read educating myself on the topic.

4. What’s the best lesson you learned from your mother/grandmother?
Be disciplined and work hard. Be independent and strong. Sounds like a typical Chinese mother, right?

5. We’re all unique. What is your special gift?
I think I am able to capture the beauty right in front of us, through my camera lens.

6. What could women be doing to make their community a better place?
Support, encourage and uplift each other! Let each person know how important they are in their situation.

7. What would you do if you weren’t afraid?
I would leave the comfort of my home and embark on some sort of adventure involving my camera, running shoes and yoga mat.

How would you answer these questions?

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The Fault In Our Stars

I went and saw "The Fault In Our Stars" last Friday. This was a last minute, serendipitous outing - my son and his friends made plans to "go to the movies" and I assumed they were going to see "Transformers" (a group of teen boys - seemed logical to me). An hour before the movie's start, I learned they planned to see "The Fault in Our Stars", so I decided to join them and friend Jill, who was the evening's chauffeur.

Of course, Jill and I sat far away from our sons, and thus started the biggest cry-fest of my movie-going career. Wow, I could have gone through an entire box of tissues...[Instead, I found myself wishing I picked up more napkins from the snack bar]. Words cannot describe the gamut of emotions that coursed through my brain, heart and soul. And I was glad to have experienced it. The movie made me think and ponder - what actions I would take if I were faced with the inevitability of a young death? I would certainly take more risks, speak my mind more, after all what would you have to lose? But why should our actions be any different because of our "normal" lives? Aren't all of our days numbered? What should I be doing differently, right now? Something to think about.

I subsequently found the movie's soundtrack, downloaded it and cried some more. The title track, All of the Stars by Ed Sheeran is simply beautiful, haunting and heartbreaking. The official video features inspirational sayings that compliment the song.



Because I'm a glutton for punishment, I am considering reading the book now, just to take in the wonderful prose and yes, to cry some more....

It's just another night and I'm staring at the moon
I saw a shooting star and thought of you
I sang a lullaby by the waterside and knew
If you were here, I'd sing to you

You're on the other side
As the skyline splits in two
Miles away from seeing you

But I can see the stars from America
I wonder, do you see them too?

So open your eyes and see
The way our horizons meet
And all of the lights will lead
Into the night with me
And I know these scars will bleed
But both of our hearts believe
All of these stars will guide us home

I can hear your heart on the radio beat
They're playing "Chasing Cars" and I thought of us
Back to the time you were lying next to me
I looked across and fell in love

So I took your hand
Back through lamp-lit streets and knew
Everything led back to you

So can you see the stars over Amsterdam?
Hear the song my heart is beating to

So open your eyes and see
The way our horizons meet
And all of the lights will leave
Into the night with me
And I know these scars will bleed
But both of our hearts believe
All of these stars will guide us home

And oh
And oh
And oh whoa
I can see the stars from America

If you don't mind crying during a movie, I recommend seeing it. You'll remember what it was like to fall in love again, that fear should not transcend action, and even amidst a season of loss, life goes on.

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Regarding Friendship

I've returned from a trip out east which included my 25th college reunion. Because I grew up in Massachusetts, I still feel like I'm "going home" each time I travel there, and we visit quite regularly - we fly into Boston, get to experience the Boston traffic and visit the city if we have time. Even so, we don't typically drive into Cambridge or MIT. The last time I was on the MIT campus was three years ago, and while that visit was nice (read about it here), is wasn't nearly as fun. The difference two weekends ago was the addition of old friends, which made me realize those friends are what made the visit so special.



I loved seeing my friends Amy and Deb. We were all Chemical Engineering majors (Course 10 for those familiar with MIT speak), which meant we logged hours working problem sets, studying for tests and running lab experiments together. More important than being classmates and lab partners, each woman provided a shoulder to cry upon, a listening ear and a beacon of support. We helped each other maneuver the years of transition into adulthood. We were missing one friend's presence - Robin. Robin, Amy and I traveled to Europe upon graduation and embarked on a month long adventure from the UK to France, Italy, Greece, Germany and the Netherlands. It's a trip I will never forget. Such are lifelong friends - we exchange holiday cards each year, attended or served in each other's weddings and watched our families grow.

We were Young Once

Close friends are special because it takes time to cultivate those relationships. Opening yourself to a new person leaves you vulnerable and open to rejection - at least it does for me. I estimate it took me at least three years once I moved here to really feel like I had a good group of friends and I am so blessed to have them.

Vegas, Baby! November, 2010

Friends are important for my kids and I love that each has a great group. Having the right friends is crucial in this crazy world they are growing up in.




This past year has given me more change in the friendship department than I really care for - one good friend moved away, another one is about do the same. I had new friends enter and friends disappear. Regardless, each friend has shaped and influenced my life. You never stop thinking about the close friends, any reconnection feels like they never left - you can pick right back up without missing a beat. Such is the mark of a special friend, with whom you can talk with about anything, who will listen and not judge what you have to say.

Special friends will do lots of crazy things with you!

CrazyK, 2011

Canoeing in the Rain - Turkey Run

Spelling Bee

Social Media sites (yes, Facebook and the like) make staying in touch with old friends so easy, but there is nothing quite like reconnecting with friends in real life, even if you have to travel across the ocean to do so.

Friends Reunited in Italy, 2010

College Roommates in the UK, 2013

Friends from Indiana - at the British Museum, 2013

Unfortunately, there are friends I will never see again - Tom and Ed, specifically.

Tom Murray, Summer 1988

Taken too early, but not forgotten.

"No Love, No Friendship can cross the path of our Destiny without leaving some Mark on It Forever" - Francois Mauriac

My friend, Kellie is moving away this weekend and we will miss her so. But we also know our friendship contains a special bond that is not easily severed. We will always be close in spirit. She posted this quote a few days ago.

“Close friends are truly life's treasures. Sometimes they know us better than we know ourselves. With gentle honesty, they are there to guide and support us, to share our laughter and our tears. Their presence reminds us that we are never really alone." - Vincent van Gogh

Reach out and be a friend, or reconnect with one today. You will be forever changed.

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